Tuesday, May 26, 2009

He is so lucky he made me laugh....

I went to Lil Boy's field trip today and Big Boy just so happened to be "on his deathbed" and couldn't go to school today. The field trip was alright. Nuthing too exciting happened. Feel free to check out the pics on FB. The fun began when I got home. Big Boy is gone to the doctor with his dad and I'm surveying the damage of him being home alone all day. Not too bad. Two wet washcloths on the floor in the hallway. But, other than that. Not too bad. So I grab my laptop so I can download the pics from the field trip. I turn it's going through the motions to load or whatever it does...the desktop appears....and there it was

WTF is this??!!?? The file name is: 133897 - Bleach Isane_Kotetsu Kiyone_Kotetsu Kukaku_Shiba Nanao Nemu_Kurotsuchi Orihime Rangiku_Matsumoto Retsu_Unohana Rukia_Kuchiki Soifon Utility_Pole_Spirit Yoruichi.jpg

Ahhhhhh...Bleach. Big Boys favorite weird anime show. This nicca been on my laptop!!! He knows damn well he doesn't touch this thing. I don't want him glancing at the mutha phucka! I click on his lil file and what do I get?????

DA HALE?!?! What is this??? Is this Kiddie Porn y'all??? Fa'real??? Is it? OMG!!! Big Boy is 12, is this the age they look at this kind of stuff.

Anways, after seeing the anime porn, I call Big Boy's dad.

Me: Ask Big Boy why he was on my laptop

Him:(to Big Boy)Yo momma said what wuz you doing on her laptop

Big Boy: My stomach hurts

Me: you sick again. You wasn't sick earlier when you were looking at porn!

Big Boy: I didn't mean to. I was looking for pictures from Bleach and it just popped up and I didn't know what to do so I-


Big Boy: No, it saved itself. I didn't kn-

Me: Forget it dude. Just don't be looking at porn on my laptop. I won't delete it though. You might wanna look at it later. Right?

Big Boy: Bye Momma

LOL!! Po thang.

"My stomach hurts."


P.S. My scribbling didn't turn out like Mo's. Mine kinda didn't help the situation. Looks like I gave em pasties and big pube bushes. Oh well you get the idea.

P.P.S. On the real, is this considered kiddie porn???

Monday, May 18, 2009

Random shyt......

Sum stuff on my mind right now....

I went out for the 1st time alone the other night. It wasn't that bad. Even though I couldn't shake Tony from Houston all nite. At least I had a few free drinks and sum semi-decent conversation. Now that I think about it.....did I really go out by myself if I spent the evening talking to that guy?

Lil Boy had a diabetes test done on Saturday. It was negative. But, we still have to get all the weight he's gained off of him. I bought him a bike and dude won't ride it. I mean what am I supposed to do? Beat his ass cause he won't exercise??? Nah...I really don't think that's what's up...

I got my best friend back. Nuf said!

I had a great conversation with a good black brother over breakfast on Sunday. Sometimes I need to talk to an upwardly mobile young brother just to remember they do still exist.

I read two books this week. Mama Black Widow by Iceberg Slim and Sharp Objects by Gillian Flynn. I think I got hoed by the dude in Barnes and Noble when I bought those books. He asked my friend I was with if she had their little "member's card". She didn't, she asked if I had one. I told her that I have a Borders member's card. When I got up to the counter to pay for my books, dude didn't even ask me if I wanted to join their lil members club. WTF! U salty dude cause I'm down with Borders??? Really? Anywho...get one of those books. Pretty good reads. And get it from Barnes and Noble. I think they need you right now.

I saw a big fat ass girl fall across the street from my job on Friday. She deserved it. All them damn colors she had on must have made her gravitational pull greater or sumthing. She had on sum lime green leggings, sum sort of shiny silver-y quilted boot type moccasin(whew..that took a lot outta me), and a black and red plaid jacket. Well, as I was watching her come out of the store, she cross the street and as soon as she made it up on the sidewalk..she kinda...just...gave up. She really didn't fall or trip, she just gave up and went down. She sat there for a second and got her big ass up and went on 'bout her business. This dude standing in the doorway of the Cricket store was laughing at her loud as hell. I wanted to laugh too but with me being a public servant now, I didn't think it was right to laugh at a client.

In her face.

I guess that's it. I'll entertain any questions you might have. Leave em in the comments.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

If Only.....

If only I could touch the hem of his garment. If only.

Holla if you hear me Thunda!